Have you ever wondered why you do the things you do? Most of us have. For the most part, our behaviour is associated to our cultural conditioning or the way we were raised. We are compared constantly to our parents, siblings or family members and their behaviour as a way of diagnosing why we act and behave the way we do. It is true; that the way were raised has a significant influence on the behavioural patterns that we display. But our upbringing is not totally responsible for who we are.
Each of us have our own unique way of responding to certain stimuli and determining if this is a positive or negative thing for us. We are all as unique as our own fingerprints. That’s why we are referred to as individuals. As individuals, we all present and respond to a first impression of others. We react accordingly. When the first impression is positive, we will warm to that person instantly and want to direct our attention to them to find out more about them. However, when that impression is negative, we will also respond with a feeling in our bodies and try to get as far away from them as we possibly can. This is in response to our instincts. We know, whether we know consciously or not.
The way in which we express ourselves is also an instinctual response to certain stimuli in our environment. When we are comfortable in our environment, we will be more at ease and therefore we are happy to be our true selves in many ways. Our private personalities are often very different to our public personalities. Our ego responds through instincts. When we have a strong self worth and self concept, we tend to act very differently to others who have a low self worth or concept. We will also create instinctively as well. Our ability to create is based on our ability to bring our thoughts into action and some of us are innately very good at doing this. Some of us are extroverts and some of us are introverts when we are expressing ourselves. Neither is more superior to the other, but rather another example of how our instincts steer us to interact and express who we are in a public or private setting.
Our emotional responses are also based on our instincts and our intuition. When react emotionally, we are for the most part acting on instinct. When we cry, we are instinctively reacting to some form of stimuli. We are connecting with our emotions of happiness, sadness, empathy, anger or fear. All of these are instinctive responses that are associated in our neural linguistic pathways and prompt a response of some sort. Each and every one of us will react according to our own unique instinctive conditioning. What is sad for one person, may bring another happiness and hence the feelings we then associate with the situation and respond accordingly.
Our thoughts and perceptions will also be a response to an instinctual reaction. Whilst we may be raised a certain way during our childhood, as adults we are also responding to our own moral compass and hence we will act according to what sits right within us and this can be very different to the way we were raised. We will then communicate verbally, energetically or via body language to send a message to indicate our instinctual responses. Communication is simply sending out a message a certain way to gain a response or reaction in order to interact with others on a certain level. Some of us are on the same page and some of us are not. Is that a good or bad thing? It really depends on who is sending the message and who is receiving the message sent. What occurs after that is purely based on the instinctual reaction between the parties.
Our interpersonal relationships are also based on our instincts. The way in which we interact will be determined by how we mix our instincts. We will be compelled to be in the company of some people and we will also be repelled. Either way, we will act or behave in a way that responds to how we interact with people in our environment and the relationships we build with them as a result. For example, a mother or father will behave very differently with their own children to how they will behave with other people’s children. Some people are born to connect with children and others are not comfortable around them at all. Hence, they will choose to become parents or not and choose careers that don’t involve any interaction with children at all. This not a reflection of whether they are good or bad people in any way, it simply reflects their choices based on their instincts to behave a certain way.
Having a sound and conscious knowledge of all of these instinctive responses will determine the way in which you will master your own instincts and use them for your own benefit. Some of us are born leaders, some of us are born to find the balance between work and play. Some of us are set in our ways and hence prefer to stay in our comfort zones. Some of us are born communicators and teachers who choose to live our lives interacting with others accordingly.
We are not all the same. We may live by the societal standard stereotypes and we may conform to the rules of society. However, regardless of our environmental stimuli and the rules and regulations we may live by, we will all ultimately use our instincts to survive in our own way.
When you know and understand how your instincts play a part in your life, you will then have a better understanding of yourself. As a result, you will then be empowered to respond accordingly. If you are behaving a certain way and you would like change this, having an awareness of why you behave that way will create the space for you to change that behaviour and hence act on your own instincts to survive your way.
